(Brock and the Burn Machine: Like a Shakeweight for straight dudes. Props: ZombieProphet) The Ultimate Fighter: Team Lesnar vs. Team Dos Santos premiered last night, and whatever the opposite of fireworks is, that's what episode 1 delivered. We begin with a video montage introducing the coaches. Brock Lesnar announces that he ain't here to make friends during the first minute. Check that off your reality show cliche scorecard. (In an unrelated story, Junior Dos Santos later refers to himself as "a sleepy bitch.") The fighters come in howling like they just got selected for a spot on�Mr. Awesome. They're told that there will be no elimination fight to get into the house, which gets them even more psyched.�Brock and Junior enter the room to a rousing ovation. The guys applaud Brock's list of credentials. Dana says that Junior "stepped aside from that title shot to come in here and teach you guys what he's got." Obviously, they're not going to mention Cain Velasquez's injury and how Junior really felt about his title shot getting delayed.Source: http://www.cagepotato.com/tuf-13-episode-1-recap-chicken-salad-anyone/
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